


i'll help you see it through (cause i just really wanna be with you)

by ghostcroc



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Angst, Just Two People Falling In Love, M/M, Not Uwu Virgil and Not Buff Boy Roman, Other People Are Hard, Prinxiety But Like, Roman Really Loves Virgil, Vent Fic Sorta?, Virgil Doesn't Know How To Think, Virgil Really Loves The Idea Of Dating Himself, awkward boys, will add tags as story progresses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:54:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27071575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostcroc/pseuds/ghostcroc
Summary: Virgil has a bit of a.. Complex. What type of complex, he’s not exactly sure, but he does know that falling in love with Roman has absolutely thrown it off balance.“Dumb prince,” Virgil huffed, hunching down further in his chair and blowing his dyed fringe out of his face. Despite his greatest efforts, his mind trailed back to that past afternoon, when Roman had smiled at him from across the room. His smile was quite pretty, he had found, and lit up his stomach like little fireworks, cheering into his throat and making his breath catch before he could utter a word.“He just doesn’t know when to quit it…”OrVirgil is madly in love with himself, and liking other people too is confusing.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	i'll help you see it through (cause i just really wanna be with you)

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was... something that came to me as a flurry of ideas. this is kinda? a vent fic? just with the experiences in it? and it's how i think it would go if i ever fell in love.  
> i also thought virgil would be a really interesting choice for the main character, as typically he's portrayed as having no self esteem. but wouldn't it be fun if he had a superiority complex while yet also thinking he was the worst thing to ever be created on earth? yes. yes it would. uh, i hope you can enjoy this.  
> fic title from the song 'waste' by foster the people  
> WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER:  
> uh, mild cursing, a daydream about kissing between minors

The first time it struck Virgil that the way he thought of Roman was a little different to other people, it was a completely unextraordinary day in mid-april, at the back of his calculus class and he was thinking about nothing.  
Well, nothing was hardly the word.  
It was more like… everything.  
Everything and nothing, his head drifted through endless streams of thought like he was breezily flipping through the pages of a dull, unimportant novel.

He typically thought of Roman, in calculus class.  
Virgil leaned his chin on his hand, looking out of the window.  
He wasn’t sure exactly why.  
Roman just had that stick.  
He stuck.  
Roman stuck like a little blob of blu tac on the back of an old band poster that didn’t stay when you tore it off the wall, and it was so, so annoying.

Maybe he thought of Roman because the period before calculus was always art, and Roman liked to sit next to him and smile at him and insult him with those little sparkly eyes of his.

Virgil assumed he was just bored.  
And Roman was weird, so his mind grasped for entertainment.

He chewed on his lip absently, fringe falling in front of his eyes. ‘What would it be like to kiss Roman?’ he wondered, swinging his legs up so that he could sit cross-legged in the uncomfortable plastic chair.

He pictured the princely boy leaning in, hazel eyes locked onto Virgil’s lips. He would smile, just a little, that awkward lopsided grin of his, and then…  
Then Virgil would feel the calming, soft press of his mouth against his own, and it would be, warm, and nice, and good. And he would feel Roman’s calloused palm cradle his cheek, and he would tilt his head into the feeling because of course, dream Virgil would be good at this.  
Maybe real Virgil wouldn’t, but did it really matter? It was all just in his head.

Perhaps this was a sign that he wanted to kiss Roman.  
But… he didn’t think so. He would want to kiss his clone just as much as he did Roman.  
There was nothing remarkable about the boy, nothing felt different, and everyone says it’s supposed to be different. Roman was supposed to stand out.  
Virgil huffed, resting his head in his arms and kicking his feet back down again.  
It was all so confusing.

Maybe he didn’t even like Roman at all.  
It certainly didn’t seem like it.  
Maybe he was just making it all up in his head, as a distraction from the fact that he’s never exactly felt much of anything.

‘Now, that’s emo, even for me,’ he thought half-heartedly, shutting his eyes.  
He felt a little tired.  
This topic is tiring.  
He should move on now, think about something else.

…

It would be weird to like Roman anyway.  
Roman wasn’t even cute.  
You’re supposed to find people you like cute, right?  
Roman’s face was average.  
He had hazel coloured eyes, a little on the small side, with dark eyebags like he never got enough sleep. His light tan skin wasn’t very clear either, with spatterings of acne ranging from his hairline to his jaw. AND he had a kind of big nose.  
All that isn’t attractive, right?  
Roman’s face wasn’t pretty, so why was it so stuck inside of his head?

He and Roman were friends.  
That must be why.

But then…  
He hardly thought of Logan’s face, and had maybe thought of Patton once or twice. In his life.  
Feelings surrounding his friends were always so empty and unclear, he tended to forget they existed sometimes.  
But…  
Roman felt more like a friend.  
Or how friends were supposed to think of each other.  
Maybe.  
His shoulders heaved in a sigh, and he sat a little straighter again, if only to peek at the clock.

10 minutes to go.  
He was seeing Roman at lunch, they had agreed to meet in the corner of the field.  
Virgil felt a tiny smile cross his face at the thought.

\----  
“The grass is so wet, ew.”  
“Shut up, you pussy baby.” Virgil returned, relaxing as he lay his back on the damp ground.  
There was a gasp from overhead, followed by a rapid shuffling sound, and he opened one eye to see Roman above him, pretending to be aggressively kicking him in the side.  
Virgil snorted, slapping a hand over his mouth. “Go away, dork.” he huffed, sitting upright.

Roman just laughed back at him, and carefully squatted on the grass, grimacing as his hands began to get wet from the rain covered soil.

Virgil rolled his eyes, and in one fell swoop, kicked the boy’s legs out from under him and latched onto his torso, pulling him downward and rolling over.

“Virgil, you huge dickstick!” Roman squawked, letting out an “oof-!” as he was sandwiched between the other boy’s chest and the hard ground. He scrambled to get up on his own two feet again, but after a few moments of struggle where he hadn’t moved an inch, he sighed dramatically. “You suck.” Roman announced, relaxing in Virgil’s hold and resting his head on the floor. “Now I’m all gross and wet. I look dumber than ever, Jack Smellington!” he whined, scowling at the mess of dyed purple hair in his vision.

There was a hum of agreement from the mess.

“Wow.”

Virgil began giggling quietly, head still pressed into Roman’s shoulder as his frame shook.  
“You’re so dumb, princey.” he mumbled softly, against his collar.  
“You’re dumber,” he whispered back, and suddenly, the air felt so… tense.  
A heavy, thick cloud of something pushed down onto Virgil’s head, and his arms reflexively tightened around Roman’s torso.  
The both of them dared not say a word, with this new threat hanging between them, of breaking this peaceful, important silence that had settled there.

And, then Virgil couldn’t take it any more.  
“You’re dumbest,” he smirked, and tilted his head upward to meet Roman’s eyes.

But Roman was already staring at him, eyes with such a glint of, something in them, it was such a strange sight that Virgil had to do a double take.  
It looked like he liked him.  
Did Roman like him? I mean, he was being pretty cool there, if it was Virgil, then he would be staring like that too, probably-

‘Shut up, dummy,’ his mind supplied.

And so he did. And he also got up off of Roman, and he also dusted off his jeans, winced at the damp rain fabric rubbing against his legs, and he also didn’t look back as he continued the walk around the field.  
‘If Roman was in love with you, he would follow.’ he thought to himself, quite illogically, as he looked around at the blossoming trees.  
The thudding noise of converse on dirt followed after him.

**Author's Note:**

> i honestly don't know where i was going with this idea, so any feedback or ideas would be greatly appreciated. thank you, and i hope you have a good day


End file.
